Life is hard. How do I process it all?

I don’t even know how to start this. I’ve been homeless for 8 days now. I’m autistic, queer, and completely alone. My 19th birthday is in a few hours, and I've gotten heard here more then anywhere else . I found advice and understanding.

I got kicked out after coming out to my parents. Their last email to me was cold, hateful, like I was a burden they were finally done pretending to care about. They haven’t answered me . I’m not sure they’d even care if something happened.

Being outside is terrifying. Loud noises make my brain feel like it’s breaking open. I stim constantly rocking, flapping, biting the inside of my cheek until it bleeds, just to stay grounded. I barely sleep. I barely eat. Everything feels too big, too sharp, too much.

A Redditor messaged me today ago after seeing a post. She said she wanted to help—food, a little money toward a ticket to get to my job interview. We talked for hours. I trusted her. But when I showed up, a man was there instead. No food, no safety. Just him trying to get me into his car. I panicked and ran. I reported him, but I haven’t felt safe since and triggered my anxiety badly 😢

In three weeks, I have an appointment with a social worker. There’s a chance for help then—get to my free ousing, get my ticket maybe even a way to show up to my job without looking like I’ve been living on the street. But three weeks feels like forever when you’re scared, and invisible.

I don’t know why I’m writing this. I guess I just want to feel like I exist to someone.