After a bit of reflection and pain coming to a head, I just have to ask what do I do when I realize that I’m unwanted?

2 months ago 30

My wife married me to fit a narrative.

My mother had me to have a caretaker.

My father chose to stick around because he had to, and is and was ill equipped to raise me.

I left my home and my friends 5 years ago and I don’t think it really mattered.

I’m probably the 3rd most important guy in my job that requires 3 people.

I make art that no one cares about.

I’m not part of the ruling elite, and I’m a fat male person of color, so I don’t necessarily “count.”

Like what do I do? If I start to do everything in service of me, all of what I have goes away and I’ll finish the job of having and being nothing. Because then I don’t talk to any of those people anymore. And I won’t find anyone else.

submitted by /u/midnightmustacheride
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