Why am I alone?

It’s New Years Eve. Everyone has plans. No one invited me. To be more specific, all my friends have plans with their boyfriends. My ex and I recently broke up a month ago (he cheated).

Spending the holidays mourning a breakup is the worst feeling in the world. Spending the holidays alone when I was supposed to have my person. From the outside looking in, my life in complete. I’m accomplished in fitness, career wise, morale wise. But I am not happy. Other than fitness, this year has been a complete disaster for me. Financial burdens left and right. A heart breaking and life changing health diagnosis.

I feel like I am a good person. I feel like I treat everyone equal and with kindness. I have done the work and self reflection on my self to be aware of my own flaws, I’m not perfect. But I can’t help but feel like I’ve had a shitty hand dealt to me with life. Why is that? Why me?