Sometimes I feel like I just can't improve myself.

I've been working on trying to make my hair less frizzy for a little over a year now. I've tried

• adding conditioner to my routine
• adding leave-in conditioner to my routine
• sleeping on a bamboo pillowcase (it's like silk)
• adding a hair mask to my routine
• drying my hair with a microfiber hat
• drying my hair with a hairdryer on low heat
• using a hair gel

and nothing has worked at all. My hair looks as awful as ever. I went to an expensive salon and they told me it's not frizzy, but it very visibly is. Anyone can see it. And also I didn't like the hairdo they gave me.

I go to the gym and exercise, but the exercises don't seem to get any easier over time and I never seem to show results. I managed to go in twice a week (the most I can tolerate w/o overtraining symptoms) and it didn't really do anything. And life happens, it's hard to stay consistent.

For around a year, I'd go out and try to make friends. I made probably four. One has kinda ditched me since then, two of them have become very busy so I can't seem them much, and the last is now living with me for financial reasons. I do feel lucky to have her, but it feels like a lot of time for such weak results. And I still feel like the same repellant weirdo I did before then.

The only things I've done that have actually improved my life has been buying new clothes & decorating my home. And well, I've also gotten better about stretching, which does make me feel a little better. IDK, I guess the problem is ultimately that I need to put more time and energy into these things in order to show results. But man, life is hard and it's hard to be consistent for that long without seeing a light at the end of the tunnel.

I think I need to focus on something that I know can work, like saving up money to go back into the city and buy some more clothes and actually look OK. Maybe that little life upgrade will give me the sense of satisfaction I need to redouble my efforts and commit to lasting improvement.