Miss my childhood

Turned 30 recently, and am just lost.

I make decent money, but wondering how to break into six-figures and am lost with my career. I don’t have many friends, and I’m not happy.

I miss the structure of school and making friends when it was simpler. People are complicated now and I don’t even know what’s going on…why they don’t like me, etc. I come across as socially awkward and don’t know how to fix it, and am starting to give up trying to figure out people.

Women are mean, it seems if they’re not sexually-attracted to you, you’re treated like shit without any manners…at least until they grow older.

I’m literally just living and don’t know what’s going on. Everything is just muddied to me now. I don’t even know who I am.

I don’t see anything great with adulthood. It’s just B.S. on top if other B.S. Yea cool, I get to own things and do my own taxes and what not, but that’s not happiness to me.

I get nostalgic about my past. I’m posting here for some insights.