marriage is scary (and kids)

i’ve (F20) always felt i was designed for love (in all its different forms - platonic, romantic, familial), but i find marriage scary.

people change over time. you might be compatible with someone at 20 and just change over time. you might not be compatible anymore at 50. one of my first thoughts towards marriage is “afraid to marry a man who behaves like my father”. and then i have moments where i think i’m the man like my father, lol

when you and your spouse have children, your job is to be a parent before anything else. co-parenting your child means that your marriage has to be stable and secure. your partner might suck and be deeply insufferable, but the philosophy is that you have to put up with them for your children. (this scenario doesn’t factor in divorce)

does marriage really boil down to how much of each other you can put up with?