3 weeks ago
11
When I was in my early 20s, I went down to the Gulf Coast to find work. I got a job offshore in the Gulf of Mexico on an oil platform. It was sand blasting/painting. It sucked, 14-hour days of hard ass work. 3 months later, I got on with a different company doing production operators on the oil platform. My pay was OK back then ($11/ hr), but I worked 12+ hours each day at work. This was 1 week on 1 week off, but i pulled several extra shifts, so it was 3 and 1 half the time for a few years. The sand blasting job didn't have a schedule. It was based on the job scope.
I paid off my debts I had and kept my expenses low. There was nothing to spend money on when I was at work.
During most of the years of my 20s I lived out of my SUV on my days off. It didn't have much, and I had rented a few times, but it didn't make sense to waste money on rent when I wasn't around much.
My work schedule was the primary reason any relationship I had failed. At 29 I went to see a Dr. about a vasectomy, I didn't have kids and didn't want them with the wrong person or in a failed relationship. I was sick of dating and failed relationships at that time. The Dr said he would do it after I was 30. I had an appointment 2 days after my 30th birthday. A hurricane come into the gulf of Mexico and once again the company failed to get us off the platform (this happens way more often than it should). Anyway, my crew change was delayed and I missed the vasectomy appointment. I never followed up to reschedule right away.
At this time I was living in Florida. Another year later and I was sick of the hurricanes between work and living in Florida. So I was moving to Tennessee. The house and land purchase kept getting delayed or turned down. Lending on housing was tight back then. At the time I was so frustrated with the home purchase. Little did I know that all the events happening brought the love of my life to me.
I met my future wife 4 weeks before I moved to TN. The home purchase took almost 4 months to happen because of different issues. I didn't tell the woman I had just met that I was moving out of statement we were first going on dates. Once I did close on a property in TN I told her about me moving, she was passed at me. We tried long distance relationship for a year. During that year I knew she was the best woman I had ever dated and wanted to marry her. She didn't want to move in with me unless we were married, but she never pushed that topic either. I spoke to her mom and dad about it. They both gave me their blessings in proposing to my soon to be wife.
We have been married for almost 11 years and have 3 kids. We both make time to put our relationship as a priority and talk about the future together. Sheworks for the woman who did my home loan for me all them years ago, they have a special relationship, I told her boss that my wife and only met because the house purchase kept getting pushed back.
One time ger boss mentioned selling the mortgage brokerage to my wife down the road at some point.
I wanted to share this part of my story because you never know how today's struggles are the guide for your future.
I left out a whole lot of crazy shit that has happened in my life. But 18 through my 20s were mentally and physically tough being isolated at work and living in a car, almost dieing more times than I can remember, explosions, seeing people die in my arms, survive remorse. I hope the people who are struggling in their 20s will see that it is definitely the toughest time in life but it gets so much better. I am planning on quiting my job in a year or two and being home full-time. It's tough being away from my wife and kids 2 weeks at a time.
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