I have brain damage

That’s it

My ability to work and socialize is kaput, been trying for 23 years to grow up, tough it out but I can’t

I am nearly completely lobotomized somedays, idk what did it, the cord wrapped around my neck when I was born or some other fucked up medical disease

I can’t remember how to spell basic words, my day is just pieces of memory’s and sensations. I forget how I got places, I forget what I ate or how I got home somedays. Time is meaningless, what’s the difference between last week and 5 years ago when there’s no cohesion and mostly darkness.

I know if I get hooked up to an MRI my brain is going to be some kind of messed up but I can’t really put together the right steps to get there.

I have been many places, done many things but they don’t feel real, like dreams from years ago. I’ve worked a lot of jobs, been to college twice but I suck at everything. I have the potential, I have a lot of knowledge but it’s inaccessible.

I feel like giving up at my big dreams and just living in the moment for the rest of my life.