I feel the call to the void every day.

As the title says, I feel the call of the void every day. I have a decent job, and a loving family, but I can’t help but feel the desire to do something permanent. I am in pain, physical, emotional, and spiritual. I’m going through a hard time in life right now. I’m facing some of the worst legal challenges that one can imagine, a breakup paired with miscarriage, and extreme financial difficulties, and I’m just not sure how much longer I can continue to fight. I feel the desire to stop breathing to a permanent end. I know it will hurt my family, they will be devastated, but I’m in such a terrible situation all around that even if things were to miraculously get better I’d still face the unending feeling of dread for many years to come. I’ve decided to take my own life, in due time, only waiting on certain circumstances, but I don’t think I’ll change my mind unless I receive a miracle.