I feel like I’m subhuman due to no woman ever having any dating/romantic interest in me.

In my 32 years of living (15-17 years of romance), I’ve never had a woman give me any sort of hint of interest in going on a date with me. I’ve never been hit on, flirted with or even really complimented (excluding family) by a woman before. It’s I don’t even exist for them in a romantic sense.

I’ve seen it plenty of times as I watched women give those hints to the people (friends, family, etc) I know around me. I’ve even helped some of them realize a woman was interested in them and gave my advice/opinion on how they should move on with that info. Everyone I know around me is or has been in a dates/relationship before. All but one, me.

Realistically I know I’m not a sub human of a person. I know there is more to life than relationships and dating. I know no woman ever showing me romantic interest will not kill me while being in one doesn’t solve all of my problems as well and I also know that I can never be in one and still have a happy and content life.

Yet after saying all of that, I still think I am. To have no woman ever see me this way before while I’ve seen others experience and some even make it look easy, it’s heartbreaking to me. I wanted to experience dating, relationships, sex, etc. Yes I know relationships are a major challenge for anyone and you can easily be in a bad one as well. But darn it, I still want to be in one.

Unfortunately, with no woman ever having that interest, I’ve become very pessimistic with my dating life. I’m starting to think it’ll never exist. Let me be clear in saying that I do not blame women for not having interest in me. They have every right to never develop that sort of interest like that for me.

Like I said, the whole thing is heartbreaking to me along with the possibility of how it may never exist in my life. If you’re curious about my looks: I look like Al from Toy Story 2. Skinnier than him but a lot older (like by 30 years) as well. I’m also autistic but I can still read/see people’s body language and nonverbal communication. It may not be as great as a NT’s but it’s still decent enough. Of course my pessimism won’t ever help me but I’m not really sure it can be changed.

Also I have a feeling this will be a very polarizing post and if it does become one, let’s try to be nice to everyone. We may disagree (I most likely will) with comments on here but I know everyone who posts it is doing it for what they consider to be good.