Genuinely can't do this anymore.

Why am i so fucking miserable? How does everyone around me have a normal life? Why did i have to be born with all these disgusting imperfections? Why did looks have to be everything? The voices just won't stop in my head, been at my lowest since 6 years now. I am only 20 years old; my life hasn't even started yet. Why is like so fucking unfair? Sometimes i look up to the sky and be asking god why it has to be always me?? Can't even end it also, too scared to know what if there is an afterlife. Feels like im stuck here, in this miserable world.