I don’t want you to think of me as a quitter, but I am truly exhausted. I’m not even sure how to begin or explain it, but I’ve been under stress since childhood. Now, at almost 24, all I’ve known is work, study, and taking care of everyone around me. I solve everyone’s problems, carry constant fears, and have always pushed myself to be the over-achiever, over-lover, and everything in between.
But now, my body and mind are worn out. I’ve pushed myself to the brink, always forcing myself out of my comfort zone, fighting the unknown, and constantly overdoing things. Now everything chose to shut down in me, my brain stopped comprehending quickly, my body stopped wanna be active, and my soul stopped giving love.
I just want a break. I wish I could rest, even for a little while, or take a vacation without any worries. Everytime I go on vacation I be thinking of if I deserve it or what is waiting for me afterwards.. I’m always haunted by nightmares, and I don’t know how much more I can handle. Sometimes, I just want to disappear for a while—but even that thought scares me.
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