I see a lot of people post here with phrasing that indicates they are in mental traps.

I've put a little guide together that might help undo this thinking. I hope that it's useful.

Breaking Free from Mental Traps: A Guide to Regaining Control

Many people get stuck in unhelpful thinking patterns without realising it. One of the biggest traps is externalising and generalising personal experiences, making them seem universal and unchangeable. This guide will help you break free by shifting from fixed thinking to active, process-based awareness.

1. Spot the Mental Trap

Look for statements that:

• Externalise personal feelings: "Life is boring." (Instead of "I feel bored.")
• Overgeneralise: "Nothing ever goes right." (Instead of "This situation is challenging.")
• Nominalise processes: "Happiness is impossible." (Instead of "I am struggling to feel happy right now.")

These patterns remove personal agency and make change feel impossible.

2. Reclaim the Process: Turn Nouns Back into Verbs

Nominalisation turns processes into fixed things, making them feel permanent. Shift them back into actions:

• "I am stuck in boredom." → "I am experiencing boredom, and I can change my engagement."
• "Success is out of reach." → "I am learning what works and what doesn’t."

Verbs allow movement, change, and personal responsibility.

3. Make It Personal and Specific

Instead of:

• "Life is meaningless." → Ask: "What feels meaningless to me right now?"
• "People are unreliable." → Ask: "Who has let me down, and how can I set clearer expectations?"

Personalisation shifts the focus from an unchangeable world to an experience you can influence.

4. Take Ownership and Action

Once you've reworded your thoughts, find an action:

• "I feel disconnected." → "I can reach out to someone today."
• "Everything is overwhelming." → "I can prioritise one small step."

Small, intentional actions shift you from passive frustration to active engagement.

5. Question the Assumptions

If a thought feels absolute, challenge it:

• "Always" and "never" statements: Are there exceptions?
• "I can’t do this." → What could I do with the right support?
• "This will never change." → What’s one small thing I could shift?

By questioning your assumptions, you create space for possibility and growth.

6. Embrace Change as a Process

Growth isn’t about finding the right answer—it’s about staying engaged in the process of change. Keep noticing your language, shifting from fixed to fluid thinking, and taking small steps forward. Every moment is an opportunity to shift perspective and reclaim your agency.

*** I did use AI to format my ideas - please don't miss the point and go down an AI rant. The information is useful from my perspective. And framing I have used in the past with great success.