Questions about Discworld: the 5th elephant

I've recently finished The 5th Elephant, and there are some scenes that I have some difficulty with understanding, and that I want to ask about:

1. Constable Visit goes to deliver a message from Carrot to Colon. He goes inside Colon's office and tucks the message flimsy under an ink bottle. When Colon unexpectedly shows up, Visit gets shocked and jerks his hand, causing ink to spray across Colon's face.

I don't understand this scene because it wouldn't work irl: if you placed a piece of paper under an ink bottle and quickly pulled the paper, the result would be ink spilling over the surface of whatever the bottle was placed on rather than spraying someone standing behind you.

1. The Grandstand: when the bandit is holding Sybil hostage, pointing a crossbow at her back, Sam confronts him first by holding his hands up and walking near the edge of the light surrounding Sybil and the bandit. Sam then lights his cigar and hits the bandit with the edge of his hand as he's seen Inigo do earlier, freeing Sybil.

What i don't understand is how Vimes had time to carry out his attack before the bandit fires his weapon, since he would be a fair bit away at the beginning. Was lighting a cigar really that distracting?

Also, the bandit claims that Cheery and Detritus had been disarmed, but on the previous page Detritus was bursting out of the carriage, and there is nothing suggesting he or Cheery had been disarmed in any way. He could've been referring to the fact that they can't do anything when he has Sybil hostage, but "disarm" has a specific meaning that doesn't apply in this scene.

1. After Wolfgang explodes from biting into the firework shot by Vimes, Tantony comes and says "I thought those things shot very fast". I don't understand this statement. Did the firework shoot slower than expected?