Is it normal to never want to be in a relationship in my life?

Hey! I'm a 19(M) almost 20 in 3 months, and for as long as I can remember I never wanted to find love or be in love. Growing up it was hard being surrounded by infidelity issues and it honestly just made me disgusted. Ever since I started doom scrolling on social media, it just made my perception even worse. I got asked out by 3 girls during my time in HS, but I rejected all of them as I didn't want to deal with what I saw other people that I knew closely go through. Even now, I just don't know if I am incapable of finding love due to past trauma or what. What makes it worse is some of my family members ask me if I have a gf or not and I always tell them "No, I am going to be single for life!" and most of the time they think I am joking and laugh it off. Is there any way I can see a good side of relationships or how else can I put myself out there without the fear of what happened to my closest family and friends happening to me?