I messed up on new years eve

A couple of years ago, I used to party a lot on the weekends and often did cocaine. However, since I met my girlfriend two years ago, I stopped using it. On New Year's Eve, I felt it was a special occasion, and since a friend had some, I decided to join him. Unfortunately, I ended up getting blackout drunk and found myself at an after-party with my girlfriend's mom and her family. I don't remember much, but I was told that her cousin walked in on my friend and me using cocaine in the bathroom. She informed everyone, and we ended up getting yelled at. I left soon after, feeling very sad about what happened.

Now, I worry that I may never be able to face her family again. I just needed to share this to get it off my mind. I constantly feel like I’m disappointing my girlfriend, and I feel really foolish after having done so well for a long time.

I come from a family with a history of alcoholism, and over the past year, I’ve learned to drink slowly because I know I have no control when I indulge.