I hate my life 😢

So where to begin I hate my life sometimes I wish it was over sometimes I wish I could just had the guts to do it, but I don’t and I won’t because I would not do that to my children. I thought I had a good life, but I don’t think I have as good of a life as I thought I did. My husband doesn’t wanna be around me. He finds reasons not to be near me, Touch me any of that stuff. Just don’t know what to do anymore. I just feel so unworthy and unloved and unwanted, that it’s scary really thought by the time I was this age that I wouldn’t have to worry about this stuff anymore. I guess I’m not as worthy of life as I thought. There’s so much more to the story than what I am willing to put online, but just know that I have my reasons for these thoughts.