I always feel like the outsider.

I'm 34m. I've always felt this way and idk how to get past it.

I do well on my own or in small groups of like minded people. I really struggle with cliques and larger groups.

I know I'm a good person, and my values are never an issue. But I tend to generate interest from a lot of people whether I want it or not and that always leads to the following,

Everywhere I go, whether professionally or socially I am the outsider. Like I am expected to adapt my style and preferences to match that of the group, and respect the group hierarchy without question.

In my mind I try to talk to everyone like they are my equal. And I don't want to compromise on my sense of style or preferences. Over time the dynamics of the group wear on me and I start to lose myself.

I've not been feeling like myself lately within my relationship or work life. I'm just totally burnt out and I don't feel like myself. Like I'm just going along with what everyone wants from me.

I think part of the problem is that I've had little to no support throughout most of my life. I'm truly exhausted trying to "prove myself" seemingly every waking moment.

Anyone else feel this way?