1 month ago
27
We have been dating for 10 months. We met in South Florida, and she moved with me when I relocated to Seattle. I recently received a job offer in Alabama and will be moving there in five weeks (I move frequently for work). My girlfriend wants to be with me but doesn’t want to move to the Deep South without being married for legal protection. She is a documented immigrant from South America. She loves Seattle, misses South Florida, and hates the idea of moving to Alabama as an immigrant.
My concerns: • She has angry outbursts. She recently broke a glass and a plate during a fight (it might have been an isolated incident?) and tends to have breakdowns during stressful situations. • She is terrified of driving in Alabama as an immigrant. While I understand her fear, I’m frustrated because she wants me to drive her two hours every weekend for flights home or aerial classes. • She uses marijuana daily, and I’m concerned about her buying and using it in a state where it’s illegal.
My own faults: • I lied to her about moving to Seattle at the beginning of our relationship. • She also caught me on OnlyFans. I’m working on those urges.
I love her. She’s willing to go to therapy for the anger issues. She is sacrificing everything she loves to be with me. I’m not sacrificing as much, but I’m still nervous about moving forward. Neither of us think we would survive a long distance relationship
TL;DR: My (33M) girlfriend (25F) wants to marry before moving to Alabama for legal protection (she’s a documented immigrant). I love her, but I’m hesitant—she has angry outbursts, won’t drive in AL, and smokes weed daily (illegal there). I’ve also made mistakes (lied early on, got caught on OnlyFans). She’s willing to change, but am I overthinking marriage or are these red flags?
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