Did you lose your looks later in life? If so, how much different is it now ?

I’m in my early 40s and I’m now what people would deem ugly, partially my fault, but mostly my genetics. I’m short, pale and bald. The baldness has had a huge effect on my appearance as my head is elongated, I look like megamind, just not as exaggerated. The other factor that comes in is my skin. I spent too much time outside as a teen and in my early 20s without skin protection or even wearing sunglasses…that was really dumb of me, I also smoked on and off from mid-20s to mid 30s and drank a decent amount.

All of this aged me beyond normal, part of my mindset at the time was I have to live my life to the fullest when I’m young, because one day I’m going to be ugly, little did I know know at the time that this lifestyle would make things much worse then it needed to be. My skin is dull, it’s wrinkled around the eyes. I’m currently on a massive fitness/nutrition project to try to look better, but I don’t think it will help much, the damage is done..

I’m easily a 2 or 3 on an attractiveness scale now, where I was once slightly above avg. It’s very depressing and I never had kids, while I had casual partners, no one every wanted to get serious with me because I’m guessing they saw my genetics and wouldn’t want to risk having kids with bad genes. I’m trying to focus on hobbies and other things to have some purpose in my life, but it feels very empty and I know it’s my fault, but also not my fault at the same time. Some family members won’t even talk to me, have had others tell me I look way older, and have general disrespect from everyone around me that never occurred when I looked ok..this isn’t about women either, just general social acceptance

Guess this is more of a stupid rant, but seeing if anyone out there experienced something similar?