Dating scene

I would say one interesting thing in my life is how I just don’t date. I haven’t dated in about five years and not had any physical in those years. Every year, I tell myself I’ll date, but I’ve never really had many boyfriends in my life. After my mom died, I went to therapy and got myself together. I still enjoy therapy to this day. It’s fun. But when it comes to dating, I realize I’m not equipped for the dating scene. What I mean is that the dating rules are quite complicated. You can’t show too much interest, or they won’t like you, so you have to ignore them for them to like you. Also, I am a monogamous heterosexual woman, and I like monogamous heterosexual men. That’s my preference. Somebody once called me selfish for that. I don’t want to ignore someone to make them like me. I enjoy engaging with someone daily. It’s not about being in their face every day. I want something real! Someone that likes me and respects me and I like and respect them. I feel like, because of the things I like, I’m just not quite ready for dating." so I just avoid the whole thing