Another holiday alone

I’m all alone and going places solo feels weird and bad. Dating app still sits in silence. I’m bored and lonely. I don’t know what to do. I posted the other day when I was feeling really bad (thanks everyone) some suggested a list of things I’m thankful for and I really couldn’t come up with much other than my job but am I really thankful or just glad I have one? Every day I tell myself I’m not going to drink. Every day I get bored and start drinking, even when I know it’s wrong and don’t really want to, it’s all there is to do. I just want to shed this negativity but there is not even a pin spot at the end of the tunnel. I did a session with my therapist but as usual I did all the talking and it was just negative circles. Anyone having this experience?