After a full day at the beach, just sitting and reflecting, here are 22 things I’ve come to realize I’ve learned over 22 years—shared in no particular order.

22 Lessons I’ve Learned in Life, in No Particular Order

1. You can’t control how others’ actions affect you or what life throws your way. The only thing within your control is your own actions—so treat others with kindness.
2. Never underestimate the importance of exercise for your mind, body, and soul.
3. It’s true: we accept the love we think we deserve. You can love someone deeply, but if they don’t love themselves, they won’t see what you see. Love yourself so when you find someone who loves you, it’s a healthy match.
4. Listen to your body—it knows you better than your mind does. When you’re worn down, it will show; when you’re stressed, you may see acne or fatigue. Understand your normal and recognize the signs when something feels off.
5. The Enneagram is a helpful tool for understanding people’s motivations, but remember, everyone is unique.
6. Music is powerful. There’s a song for every moment: for releasing tears, celebrating, processing loss, or finding joy.
7. It’s perfectly fine to do things alone. Go to the movies, enjoy a meal, grab a coffee, or take a walk solo. Sometimes, your own company is all you need, and no one’s judging—they’re likely wishing they could do the same.
8. Money often equals time, especially at this stage. Choose between being time-rich or money-rich wisely; money may make life easier, but time enriches it. Sometimes, taking an unappealing job is necessary for survival, but it’s temporary—it’s all part of your journey.
9. Time heals. Let yourself cry, explore a new hobby, talk or write about your feelings, and surround yourself with supportive people. Day by day, you’ll see how far you’ve come.
10. No matter your age, you’ll never have everything perfectly together—no one does. Be kind to your elders and patient with younger people; we’re all figuring it out.
11. Loyalty is valuable, but sometimes you need to be selfish and know when to let go. If something affects your well-being, whether it’s a job, a community, or a relationship, it’s okay to move on.
12. Mental health impacts every aspect of life. Take care of it—it’s essential.
13. Not all lectures or lessons will be meaningful, but they’re only temporary. Persevere through them.
14. Working on things you’re passionate about is incredibly rewarding; don’t underestimate its impact.
15. Stop making excuses. Learn that language, pick up that instrument, or start that hobby. You have the time if you step away from Netflix.
16. Your relationship won’t fill every need—and it’s okay. They’re your person, but don’t expect them to fulfill every role. Build other friendships to complement your relationship.
17. Choose your words carefully. Avoid speaking out of anger or heartbreak; take time to gain perspective, then say what’s truly needed.
18. Heartbreak happens, whether in romance or friendships. People grow and change. Appreciate the time you shared and wish them well.
19. How someone speaks about others—exes, family, friends—reflects how they might treat you. Pay attention; it reveals more than words can say.
20. Climate change is real. While you can’t do everything, small actions help. Use reusable bags, cups, and straws. Start small and make bigger changes as you can.
21. Know your worth. Recognize your non-negotiables and your compromises in friendships, relationships, work, and school.
22. In 10, 5, 2, or even 1 year, you’ll be a different person. Whether you choose to grow positively or let life shape you passively is up to you.