19 Ive severed connections with everyone in my life and my uncle is tellling me to see a therapist because of my odd behavior.

The title. I dont understand human beings at a fundamental level and have trouble connecting with others. I have never had a girl or boyfriend and havent interacted with anyone besides storeclerks or my uncle in months. I lied about going to college I dropped out after one week because i arrived late and was extremely self concious about being seen. I look unkempt but at the same time see no point in personal upkeep for external validation. I spend all day studying human anatomy or browsing the web. I feel extremely isolated and disconnected from society and the world. I am so lonely and miss being a child. I dread interacting with anybody and am overall always really sad. I catastrophize about my future (reoccuring thoughts of me and loved ones dying, imagining the end of the world, existential dread) and I have a very negative outlook on the world and myself. I am only posting this for some type of human connection